It’s almost shot time and I’m ready for it!!! I was just telling Shawn that it’s all the waiting, and the working up to it, and the appointments here and there, that are hard for me. I just want to get on with it, do the transfer, and see what’s going to happen already!
I love this picture because it amazes me to see that with lots of God’s power + some science + ALL OF GOD’S POWER + some shots + a bruised belly, amazing things are possible. (Psssst, MIRACLES, even!)
Shawn and I love hearing about animistic societies, and what they believe, because as missionaries you have to understand their thinking in order to accurately present the Truth. If you just show up and start talking about God, they might say, “Yea, sure we believe that, He’s the man that lives up the river.” Or they might believe He’s the sun. Animism is seen with the Dao people of Indonesia and how they would run and scream in circles, stomping as hard as they could, when there was an earthquake because they believed it was a giant evil snake under the earth and that they needed to scare it away. And how Guineans believe that if a pregnant woman is seen drinking Coke it means she wants to kill her baby. Or if an owl is heard at night, it’s the sound of death looking for its next victim. I could go on forever with examples from people we lived around and beliefs that seemed so strange and so far off to us, but were reality to the very core of their existence to them.
But here we are back in America, and animism can be seen here too. Even in the TTC (Trying to Conceive) community. For example, they say that a woman who just had an embryo transfer MUST eat McDonald’s fries afterwards for the baby to “stick”. If you look up #FET (frozen embryo transfer), sure enough, people are seen posing with their bright red boxes of McDonald’s fries, post transfer, stating that they’re #PUPO (Pregnant Until Proven Otherwise). Another one is wearing a special pair of cozy socks on transfer day to “ensure the treatment will work”, and eating the core of the pineapple is another common practice to “guarantee” a positive pregnancy test.
It’s hard when you want something to work to not look for all the little ways to help make it happen. I get it. And then there’s the downward spiral of questioning IF you did everything right, did it well enough, followed the protocol accurately, etc. But ultimately, God is the author of this story. He knows my body, these embryos, the medications, the doctors and nurses working closely with us, our lives, our family, and even if I missed an important step in when and how to take such and such shot, he can work beyond our human abilities. A lot of people give science all the glory when it comes to IVF and FET, partly because doctors are incredible and embryologists are super impressive, but above all, God has the ultimate say in this whole process, and His Ways are what we stand back and marvel at. Fries or not, He is the Creator.
Not that there’s anything wrong with fries, socks, and pineapple, it just can’t be where our hope comes from. I’m all about some McDonald’s fries, and I’m hoping Shawn reads this post before he comes home from work so he can get the hint and bring me some…. Or, better yet, so as not to be seen as animistic, I’ll have him bring me a frosty and Wendy’s fries. Anyone else in love with that combo? C’MON don’t @ me. It’s quite possibly the best sweet and savory duo of all time.
Want to know what’s WEIRD? And emotional? (For Shawn too, this is the husband’s/man’s journey too!) And I’m sure I’ve said this before, but it’s so weird and so emotional knowing I’ll probably be pregnant soon but I’m not yet. I’m taking my prenatal vitamins, we know the due date (EARLY JUNE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) but, alas, I’m not pregnant. YET. But Lord willing I will be soon. And possibly WITH TWINS. (<--- that one's going to have to remain in all caps for some time). It's a wild ride and we just keep praying that this works, and that these two can join our family. But ultimately, for God's will to be done. For the Author and the Creator can surely be trusted.